For the unhappy soul...

I took up the 100 Happy days challenge on facebook. I am on Day 57 and honestly, it feels fantastic.

This challenge showed me that no matter how irritating and frustrating life is sometimes, there are surely a few things in a day that can make you smile. Life isn't as tough and as complicated as we want to make it. Often, we are so overwhelmed by the problems that we cannot find strength to look for and implement the solutions. Sometimes, we fail to communicate, ask for help. There are times when we are just exhausted by the drama and the endless cycle of bullshit. It is definitely not the easiest time in the world.

That old phrase.. 'The grass is always greener on the other side'.. got me thinking once. If the other side feels that the grass on my side is green, then what in the world is stopping me from enjoying that! 

The philosophy kinda stuck. I decided to see what was green on my end. turns out.. quite a bit. 

Living in a beautiful city (Los Angeles - So much to see and explore).
Saving money for some excellent vacations. (East coast, Vegas, SF!)
Making new friends and learning so much about random things (Did you know that a chinese surname with 2 consonants implies that someone in their forefathers was like a celebrated genius!)
Learning that food is one of the best ways to know about a culture or a person.
Doing stuff alone, may be looked at weirdly sometimes.. but is oddly satisfying.
Realizing the importance of family and well, they understand your importance too
Understanding that boys, all over the world, are the same. Oblivious, Emotionally challenged.

So now, everyday is a choice for me. To brood on what I cannot control OR To accept it, not let it screw my head and show the damn world that I can handle my own shit very well.

2 months ago, I was sad, lonely, in a foreign country, struggling with personal and professional stuff.
I needed something to keep me going everyday. The challenge was just the beginning. I will recommend it to anyone who feels that they simply need something to look forward to everyday. 
It made me realize that I need to be brave and selfish for my own happiness. I am capable of that. And that, it is not a bad thing.

The Quarter Life Crisis

So… I see this link on facebook and damnit! A realization sets in with my morning coffee... Whoa… I am already facing a quarter-life crisis. There’s a decent job, no boyfriend (no desire to have one either!), life is routine, hobbies are occasionally thought of (more like yearned on), friends are there but busy with their own lives, parents want me to just get married and fast. Sigh!

I again begin my daydreams of really enjoying life like I want to. Work 9 hours a day, 4 days a week. Travel on shoestring budgets and just discover places. Read and read a lot. Lose those extra inches and get a fabulous body. Discover something I am so passionate about that I lose myself in it and lose myself in this world. And so on… Everyday, atleast once a day, I daydream. 4 months away from being 25, I wish I were still 18 and would’ve done more. I wish my life were different and I wish I would do something.

The interesting part is, I know a lot of folks going through the same. They are bored with their jobs, they want no serious relationships (or are so committed in one that it doesn’t particularly count) and they want to read or travel or work in an NGO or just start something. There are just too many people of this category. And it made me wonder.. Why are we all so dissatisfied and unhappy? We have the ability and the power to make decisions for ourselves and yet we complain, we agonize, and rarely do anything about it.

The truth is we are a struggling generation. A generation trying to desperately bridge the gap between old and new. A generation who has seen the likes of the handheld phone and the smartphones to google glass. (Yes, our parents have also seen them, but unlike us, they are happy with the old tech!) A generation to have seen movies in single screen halls to multiplexes to Movies on demand on your home theater. A generation which has seen joint families, housewives and double income nuclear families. A generation that debates whether 24*7 connectivity is a boon or a curse (Remember the fav topic of school essays: Science a boon or a curse. Simpler times!) A generation that has seen a recession cycle and that actually understands how the economy works, how it can be fixed and well, how we can sit around and do nothing about it.

‘Ignorance is bliss’- that was the old saying. In today’s world of knowledge economy, all our wealth is knowledge. And I fear our generation has too much to process, too many things to consider and reconsider, too many options to seek information from. And with the rest of our world’s success and aspirations being rubbed on our face everyday with facebook and instagram, we really don’t want to make ourselves feel more miserable.

The average 25-year old today has seen enough changes in the world, that the pressure to make the right decision gets the better of us. Keeping up with this change is what we are learning and we Indians… Well, we are keeping up with the westernization vs. traditional war as well! It is a war out there… A war to get the perfect job, the perfect partner, a corruption-free developing/growing country, a robust economy… 

So lets cut ourselves some slack and do what we actually want to do. Make quick decisions and stick to them. Not think too much cuz that always made the decision more difficult. Let go off the pursuit for the 'extra' knowledge.. Why? Because you can. And stop this war in our own heads and hearts. Cuz whatever the war may be outside, we would finally want to die with no regrets and only peace in our lives.

And yes.. Happy Birthday Harry Potter! :)

The Constant in Change

1988- I come in this world.
1991- Kinder Garden
1995- School
2004- Junior College
2006- Under Graduate
2009- Post Graduate
2010- MBA
2011- Summer Internship.....

These are some major changes that happened in my life till date. And with each one of this change the people in my life kept changing. Some friends stayed, some others moved on. Some became even more close. I met new people and worked with them.

But 10 months staying away from home, I realized that, whatever changes, there is one place that will always love you as much and always welcome you with open arms and will always treat you the same whether a prince or a pauper... Home. The constant factor in the change that our life is.

When I taught regression to my classmates, we used to easily ignore the constant in the equation and focus on the co-efficient. The change is what people normally focus on. I have to be ready for this change. Is my preparation enough? Am I capable of handling this change? Blah blah blah... But they take the constant for granted. And worse, they never appreciate it.

Home is that constant in anyone's life. How attached and how deeply embedded family values are, defines your core. People who follow the 'I am Ok. You are Ok.' line of thought usually come from a Happy Family. I always strongly disagree with people who say that XYZ is more important than family. Then that means You, my friend are messed up (or your home is).

We try to please the world and take for granted those who make us who we are. Take time off for them. Buy them gifts. Take them out to dinner. Laugh. Smile. Make them smile. Those jokes will become family jokes that only you and your siblings get. Play Dumb Charades of weird relatives. Play Antakshari. Appreciate the constant part of your life. The part that keeps you stable. The part of your life that you were born into and makes you unique.

Cheers to Happy Homes and Happy Families!

Loneliness

It pricks me like a thorn long

Is this the place where I belong?

I ponder aimlessly in this maze

The starry skies fixed my gaze

By instinct my hand reaches out

'No one's around', the silent breeze shouts

The stars alone seem so dull

The night is lonely, calm and lull

The horizon seems more distant now

No companion makes it longer somehow

The waves of the sea come touch my feet

'They lack company', the waves repeat

I seek peace and tranquility

Being silent for long, is an ability

For now, the empty spaces don't kill

But there's always enough for you to fill